Sad Times!

So those of you who read my blog will be aware that I suffer with depression, anyone who knows about or is going through depression you will be aware that small things can seem like the end of the world.

I am still taking my medication but recently I have started to have panic attacks (something I have never had previously). At first in all honesty I thought I was having a heart attack! My chest felt heavy, I was going dizzy and burning up.

This happened about three times in the past week and once I thought about when it was happening I realised that it was actually happening in situations I was panicking or anxious.

My moods have been so up and down this week and found it hard to focus or think positive about things, which has meant my relationship with food has taken effect. I have decided to take a bit of time off over thinking about my food and spoke to my Sliming World consultant and discussed that my mind set is not there at the moment and she was very supportive and no doubt I will be back at her group  over the next few weeks but at the moment I am finding that it is one more thing that I am doing wrong.

Over the past few years my dog (Lulu) has became my best friend. Now many of you might think that sounds ridiculous but she is. When I have been sad she has been there, when I have been happy she has been there and we have shared many days at the beach playing with her tennis ball, She is my world!

Thursday I took her to the vets for a check up and it looks as though she might have cancer. They have found a lump and there not 100% sure what it is but they are going to operate. She is almost 8 so she has that on her side so fingers crossed everything will be ok.

Monday is going to be a very long day for me, she has to be taken to the vets very early and is expected to be there most of the day, leaving her will be hard, she wont understand why she's being left and will be in a lot of pain afterwards.

So I'll be keeping everything crossed in hope it goes well.

Just thought I would give you a update on what is currently going on

Thanks for reading

Tracy xx

Swimsuit Summary!

 

Lately you may be aware that I am in the process of losing weight and trying to lead a fitter and healthier lifestyle. I enjoy the gym but recently I have found it a bit too strenuous on my joints (starting to sound old now!). Even though I am a large lady I still want to exercise and build my fitness levels.

When I was younger (lets say 6 years old) me, my mam and grandparents booked my first holiday abroad, we were going to Malta! I was soo excited to be going on a plane and it was one big adventure for me. My mam on the other hand wanted me to fully enjoy the experience and she was concerned that I could not swim.

She enrolled my onto swimming lessons at my local pool and every Saturday we'd head along to the pool and I loved it! Ever since I have loved being in the water or beside the sea (my star sign is Pisces so I think that has something to do with it.).

When I was young it was a case of taking your bather and towel to the pool to have fun, as I got older I still loved the pool but became very conscious that my body shape and size was different to others so an activity that was once fun became more unpleasant for me as my insecurities grew about my body.

I worked out that if I could make it from the changing rooms to the pool then the rest was fine. Swimming is a great activity and can be good especially for those of us that carry a bit more weight as swimming is not weight baring on your joints.

Recently I discovered a quiet private pool in my area and is mainly used by adults or classes. I love Aquafit, its soo much fun and it does not matter what size you are and you can go at your own pace if you need to. So when I seen that there was a class on 3 times a week I decided to try it out, I love it! Nobody looks at you, there all there for there own personal reasons and if anything they admire you for giving it a go.

My shape is more of a pear shape so I find buying swimwear quite difficult as I need the bottom to be bigger than the top. I thought I would share some of my thoughts on a few that I have. All swimsuits were purchased through Simply Be as they had a larger selection to choose from.

1) If you are looking for a basic swimsuit with minimum support then this one will do the trick, It is a basic high leg design and if you are looking for a swimsuit for a casual swim this would do fine however support is minimal

2) I love this swimsuit! I like that it is black but still has a bit of colour to add more interest and also the design flatters your figure as the colour sits on your ribs which does give you a bit more shape. This swimsuit has a tummy control panel which helps to suck you in but is not too restrictive. There is a built in bra shelf also so gives a bit of support too. I use this suit for aquafit and it is great but I would have preferred the body to be a bit longer just so I had full confidence whilst bouncing around in the pool (obviously that is a technical term!).

3) If your wanting full confidence in a swimsuit that offers support then this would be the one I would chose. It also has tummy control and I find this to be more supportive than number 3, The bust support is also great and you can 100% be sure that your safe in the knowledge that your secure. The only thing I did not like about this was the colour, but that is personal preference, I like to blend in and this screams look at me! I have had compliments of how nice this swimsuit is its just preference.

4) I thought all my swimsuit needs were fulfilled when I saw this one, it is a swimdress, the skirt is long and skims the hips, it is not clingy in the slightest, perfect! However the bust area is where it all goes wrong, you have to tie the top as it is a halter neck style. I became afraid that the top was going to come undone and then when it was tightly tied it was too restrictive. The cups do have slight padding but are designed to enhance your cleavage needless to say tis did not leave much to the imagination which has meant I am unable to wear this for swimming, It would be great for the beach or sitting around the pool.

I still have not found my perfect swimsuit but I am always on the look out. Do you recommend anywhere for plus size swimsuits?

Thank you for reading

Tracy xx

A change is on it's way!

Little Miss Plus Size is a very new blog and the blogging world is also very new to me! One thing I have realised is that I love being part of this community and I have found writing makes me happy. I write for myself it allows me to escape my day to day life and put a bit of time aside to focus on something that makes me happy. The thing that is strange to me is that there are people out there that are interested in what I have to say, I love reading comments and also love reading others blogs, there are some amazing ones out there.

I also love the plus size community that's out there. They are fab women that have helped and are helping me realise that yes I'm a big girl but that doesn't mean I cant enjoy fashion or beauty! Its very inspiring to see and read about. Before I started my blog I was very naïve I never heard of Plus North or the Plus Size Awards. Seeing that there is an industry for us ladies is so inspiring and a industry I would like to be part of.

Just an update on my weight loss journey, I had a bad week, I knew it would be a bad result and I was terrified to get weighed but I am 100%  sure that Slimming World (www.slimmingworld.com) is the plan for me. Saturday came (my weigh in day) and I knew I had gained (if I hadn't there would of had to be a miracle involved!).

My mam had mentioned she had a coupon for membership and first meeting for £4.95 (which is the cost of weekly meetings), me being me I know that soo early on in my journey having a gain would be seen as a negative thing so I decided to re-join as a new member. My consultant understood and was very supportive. So this is a fresh start for me, I have done my weekly shop and planned my meals so I am going to be enjoying doing a bit more cooking.

If your determined to do something but you keep getting pushed back, just keep pushing forward at the end of the day what have you got to lose? You owe it to yourself to be in charge of your own happiness and success.

I have also been thinking about my blog and the direction in which I would like to move forward, I am going to be aiming to upload new posts twice a week, one will be fashion/beauty related and the other will be lifestyle related.

I like the thought that I have somewhere to express my feelings at least once a week and hopefully find motivation to keep going to lead a healthy lifestyle. I am not 100% sure on the days I will be uploading but I don't work weekends or Wednesdays so I'm hoping to find a routine that can work with both my blog and my work.

The thought that there is even one person reading my blog amazes and pleases me soo much, so thank you! I genuinely appreciate.

Thanks for reading

Tracy xx

Time to get Fit!

Hi everyone! so if you have been reading my previous posts you will be aware that I am struggling with my weight at the moment. I recently joined slimming world and this is my second week and I struggling, I'm an emotional eater and I'm feeling low at the moment so trying to stick to an eating plan seems to be like a huge task right now.

I have decided now is the time to incorporate exercise into my daily routine and I wanted to share with you some of my new products which I'm hoping will help and motivate me on the way.



My new Nikes

Ever since I was a teen I absolutely loved Nike trainers, there so comfy and last a long time. So even though they can be expensive they are completely worth it in my opinion.

The pair I decided to purchase were the Nike Pegasus 30, there bright, colourful and super comfy! I'm in love!



Dumbbells

Ok so I have been a member of a gym for a while now, unfortunately I just don't attend! At home I own a treadmill, bike and cross trainer and now I have just purchased a set of USA Pro dumbbells. They range from 0.5kg-2kg. My plan is that since the gym isn't working for me at the moment is to use my dining room as a home gym and incorporate home exercise with outdoor walking (which lulu is very excited about).



Fitbit Flex

A few weeks ago I decided to purchase a Fitbit Flex, for those of you who aren't aware it is a wrist band that tracks your steps, distance, sleep patterns etc. When I am in the mind set of weight loss and exercising I work best seeing my progress and improving my previous stats. I have tested out the sleep function and I was very impressed, it told be how long I was asleep, how many times I was restless and also if I woke up during my sleep. The device itself does not display any information other than progress dots, in order to find out the stats you sync your Fitbt to the Fitbit app which is easy to do but a shame there is no information displayed on the band. If you would like me to do a full review on this please leave me a comment down below.

 

Ok so lets hope I can get moving more and become more active! Let me know in the comments what motivates you?

Speak Soon

Tracy

xx

Failures on an Emotional Eater

Ok so this may get personal, actually wait this will defiantly get personal. All my life I have been over weight, from a very young age, however I have always been happy and  took pride in the clothes I wore, ok so let's fast forward a few years, in my late teens I started to be more conscious of my size and wanted to start loosing weight I did and lost approximately 3 stone so I was still a big girl but could still manage happily in day to day life. Now a couple of bad relationships later and life getting in the way I am sitting in my car writing this now an obese young adult woman who is suffering depression, I never thought this would be me! People warned me and did I listen? No! Slowly I started to comfort eat more frequently and gained a lot of weight in a small amount of time. The clothes I used to be inspired by no longer fit, the gym classes I used to go to are now a huge struggle. Now in no way am I sitting here blaming anyone but myself but if your reading this and see a familiar pattern, talk to someone maybes you need to talk about your emotions or seek professional help, I didn't, the weight kept going up and my confidence kept going down. I'm currently only fourth week of Fluoxetine and in the process of counselling. Once my demons in the past are let out into the open I'm hoping my weight loss journey will not be so hard. I admire you curvy ladies who are strong and confident your helping people liked remember why we are here!

Sorry for being too personal but thought it would be good to let you know a little bit about me.

Thanks for reading

Tracy

xx